February 23, 2011-
Original Post 1.2.2010
The decade has come to an end. Although we may not yet be embarassed by some of the pop culture trends that we followed and loved, here is what we will look back at and cringe at in a few years, in no particular order…
The New Jersey Douchebag– Based on TV shows of the past decade, one would think that douchebags flock to NJ like actors flock to LA. Thanks to the likes of The Real Housewives of New Jersey, The Sopranos (a lesser offender)and MTV’s recent unveiling of Jersey Shore, New Jersey based shows got their fair share of air time this decade. Based on what America has seen on TV, if you don’t know anyone who is actually from there, you are forced to assume that every resident of that state works for a construction company, is addicted to ‘roids, wears gold chains, sleeps nightly in a tanning bed, and has killed at least 5 people and never changes out of a matching jumpsuit. Having been there and being friends with some residents that have normal skin coloring, no rap sheet and have never flipped a table at dinner, may the new decade move on to enforcing stereotypes about a different state (leave Michigan and Detroit out of it).
15 Minutes of Fame– As an avid reality TV watcher, I would be a hypocrite if I hated on the genre, but I won’t hesitate to hate on the monsters it has created. This decade everyone and their brother has had the opportunity to get their 15 minutes, no talent required, evolving from last decades trend of white trash beat the crap out of one another on Jerry Springer. Audrina, Joe Millionaire, Speidi, Omarosa….need I say more? I have a feeling that in the next decade we may see an additional spike in unemployment when the 15 minutes are up and we have 1000 Real World/Road Rules Challenge contestants sleeping on the streets.
The EXTREME makeover: Plastic surgery has been around for quite awhile, but it wasn’t an everyday thing to many Americans living outside of LA until it was welcome into our homes by shows like The Swan, Extreme Makeover and Dr. 90210. Before many thought botox, boob jobs and Brazilian butt lifts were just for the rich and famous, but this decade it was made clear to us that it was even for the average Josephine. Shows like the aforementioned allowed us to see that the Ugliest of the Betties could have their who face and body transformed to that of a different person. I’m all about looking good, but I am guessing by the end of the decade many people featured on the shows that made them unrecognizable probably did not end up any better off in the end, seeing as they will still be stuck with the same personality and depth that wasn’t able to shine through some crooked teeth. Stay tuned for Extreme Makeover: The Personality Edition.
The Canine Accessory: It started off with Paris Hilton toting around Tinkerbell in her purse, and trickled down Mary from Memphis paying $5000 to get a mini canine to tote around in her Louis Vuitton knock off, complete with a mini pink sweater to match her own. I am all about dogs, but as a disposable toy? I can only imagine how many young girls were shocked that they actually had to clean up after and feed their updated version of a friendship bracelet, and how many made a trip to the pound after that discovery. Paris Hilton has apparently grown tired of her staff cleaning up after her pooches and recently made room for a miniature pig (I kid you not). What next?
The Soulja Boy: As an avid fan of this trend, I saw every flaw in it and still danced the night away with the rest of America and screamed when I hear the beat coming through the speakers at the bar. How could you hate on something that made “Supermaning a Hoe” a common household term? How could anyone hate on such creativity? Unfortunately, after hearing some additional songs by Soulja Boy Tell ‘Em and not hearing Soulja Boy on the airwaves, I think it may be time to wave goodbye to the Macarena of the New Millenium.
The Socialite: Paris Hilton, Nicole Ritchie, Kimberly Stewart…Are you still there? These fascinating, no talent creatures soared to new heights this decade. We couldn’t look away. Famous for terms such as “That’s Hot” (that said heiress probably did not even make up herself), sex tapes, not wearing underwear and other ingenious moves, who wouldn’t want their daughters looking up to such geniuses?
Multiple Births: (Disclaimer : This is not intended to hate on anyone who has had multiple births and has not exploited their children. ) John and Kate, take the Octomom and get out of the spotlight. You are royally screwing up your kids chances at being normal. We see what happens to child stars…I am ever so interested to see what happens to child reality TV stars, and I think I have an idea. And really, why does anyone watch this crap? Since when is watching someone change 8 diapers and wipe food off of 8 dirty mouths with an Ed Hardy shirt appealing? It’s beyond me, but I’d rather watch a litter of puppies.
Tyra Banks: Enough said.
Twitter: Good lord, who the hell cares? “Steve is in the bathroom”. “Steve is taking a nap”. Come on people! Really, do we need to know your thoughts on what is happening every moment of the day? At least Facebook has pictures and I can communicate with you and see how much weight you have gained since high school. And do not get me started on the Celebrity Twitterer. Are we really obsessed with Chris Browns verbal abuse via Twitter and Miley Cyrus deleting her account? Come on! I am obsessed with celeb culture as much as the next shallow individual, but who even knew most of these people could form a sentence.
Crocs– Oye! How many people latched on to this ridiculous trend? You people should be ashamed of yourselves! If you have these shoes in the closet you should be embarrassed. They are sure to be the equivalent of tight rolled denim in the 80’s. Throw them out, be sure to get rid of any of those nasty little decorative pegs you stuck in the holes, now and destroy any pictures that you may have sported them in. I tried to keep fashion out of this, but these ugly little guys couldn’t be ignored.
Here’s to a fab new decade, full of full sized dogs, shoes without holes in them and only children!